So i haven’t written down my brain puke in a while. i figured i should give it a go. To begin with i figured i should listen to Paramore. They make me feel like the bad girl most of you know me to be. the girl that loves living on the edge. the one that loves risking it. the one that does not need a perfectly spelled out brief of everything before she goes ahead and does it. whatever ‘it’ may be.
Ok enough of the pity party. lets get to the point…. which iss??
Right! Point! i cannot seem to find my creativity!!!!!! AAAAHHHH!!!!
Its fucking annoying!
Everyone i speak to says i have it in me. that its only natural for me to follow what i have always wanted to do. But how can they be so sure if i’m unsure myself?
Some have said i gave my dreams a try and they didn’t work out so maybe i should let them go… start new ones? dream new dreams? If you can keep dreaming up new dreams how does anyone get to the end? Wouldn’t we keep changing our ideas of whats right for us at that moment?
Others have said I am the best at what i can do. SO UNTRUE!!! there’s so many awesomely talented people out there…i just haven’t met them yet. Maybe that’s what i need to do… meet new people. new fucked up people. who like me have no idea WTF they’re doing. But they do it anyway. because they probably like me believe in fate? or something like it.
And then there are the ones who believe its their fucking mission in life to brag about their lives and pretend to give a fuck about your’s.
So many fake people. Its really quite sad. i feel sad for people who are fake. coz being real is awesome. i guess freedom starts the minute you are completely and utterly REAL.
how to be real? stop fucking lying. just stop lying and stop fucking with people’s heads! its really rude to fuck with another’s mind!
MINDFUCK! fucking men. and their fuckign mindfuck games. i hope you rot in hell. but then again all the fuckers… they are always the best man they can be for the next girl. Kindv like onev of those “always the bridesmaid never the bride” moments? Oh well… people come people go people live people die life goes on big WOOP!
fuck off now. much love. ciao. x